Behind the scenes: The Year that was....2020.

Wow. And just like that, this past year has flown by.

At the beginning of the year, I definitely remember thinking: “This is the year.” The year that my commercial career takes off, the year that I work on meaningful personal projects, the year that I grow roots and settle myself in Vancouver. I settled myself in this apartment alright.

This year did not go as planned, for myself and for many of you as well. Like most creative endeavours, there is the idealized vision of what we want to achieve. And then there is the messy execution. The unexpected challenges. The moments of insight.

I recently watched Soul and it really resonated after a year like this. I would highly recommend it. On Roger and Ebert’s film review, the author concludes that “The film's message could be summed up as, "Don't get so hung up on ambition that you forget to stop and smell the flowers." No new revelations. So why do I find myself still getting hung up on being so ambitious?

Like a lot of other people, work and career was put on pause. My ambition waned with the lockdowns and uncertainty. I was forced to stop and smell the flowers, because what else was there to do? I counted my blessings: a few clients, the time to write, a loving partner, healthy friends and family, and the time to bake and ride my bike. I think that the film reviewer might have gotten it wrong. The point of life isn’t to occasionally stop and smell the flowers. Life is stopping and smelling the flowers.

So, what are things like going into 2021? If I’ve learned anything this year, it’s that I’m in it for the long haul. I’ve grown more patient with myself over the years, allowing myself to slowly chip away at projects I want to accomplish. Letting myself diverge into new creative hobbies, like picking up my grandma’s old sewing machine or baking bread (like so many other people). Watching lots of great films and TV shows and remembering why I got into all this in the first place.

I think Alice Wu (The Half of It, Saving Face) put it perfectly in this interview:

I think you ultimately have to make a choice whether your work is going to drive your life or your life is going to drive your work, right?

I’ve always been a big believer that the more interesting one’s life, the more interesting their work. I’m slowly appreciating that the journey is the point - not the end or the goal. Here’s to taking the next year, one day at a time.